Stage 3 · Lesson 5 of 6

Using envy as information

Comparison, LinkedIn and your own timeline

Envy is uncomfortable, but it can tell you something useful: what you want. If a classmate's internship stings, maybe you want that kind of work. If someone's confident presentation bothers you, maybe you want to be heard.

Instead of pushing the feeling away or resenting the person, ask: what exactly do I envy, and is it something I truly want or something I think I should want? If you want it, what is one small step towards it? Sometimes the honest answer is that you do not want it at all; you only want the approval it brings. That is worth knowing too.

Common trapturning envy into a verdict on yourself ("I am behind") instead of a pointer ("I want this, so let me work towards it").

A question to check yourself and an AI practice session come when you add the roadmap to your account. Add it

Resources for this stage

Practise

Greater Good in Action (UC Berkeley)
Gratitude and kindness practices that shift attention away from scorekeeping

Keep handy

Sefism LinkedIn and Personal Branding Roadmap
Use LinkedIn with a purpose: show your own work rather than watch everyone else

Also worth your time

The Courage to Be Disliked (Ichiro Kishimi and Fumitake Koga)ReadPaid
A dialogue on letting go of competition and other people's approval

Struggling right now? If you are in danger or thinking about harming yourself, contact local emergency services or a crisis line: Find a helpline (any country), Umang (Pakistan), Tele-MANAS, 14416 (India).