Stage 7 · Lesson 3 of 7
Asking directly about suicide
If you are worried a friend might be thinking about suicide, ask them directly: "Are you thinking about suicide?" or "Are you thinking about killing yourself?" Many people fear that asking will put the idea in someone's head. Research has found that asking directly does not increase risk, and many people feel relief that someone noticed and asked.
Use clear words rather than vague ones. Stay calm, listen and take what they say seriously, without arguing or lecturing. If they say yes, do not promise to keep it a secret: their safety comes first.
Help them contact a crisis line or professional, and do not leave them alone if they are in immediate danger.
Common trapavoiding the question because it feels too big, which leaves them alone with it.
A question to check yourself come when you add the roadmap to your account. Add it
Resources for this stage
Start with· follow one of these
- PlatformFreeBefrienders Worldwide
Befrienders Worldwide
Guidance on supporting someone in distress, and emotional support centres worldwide
- GuideFreeNHS Every Mind Matters
NHS (England)
The free Mind Plan quiz gives you a starting point for your wellbeing plan
Practise
Keep handy
Also worth your time
- Together: The Healing Power of Human Connection in a Sometimes Lonely World (Vivek H. Murthy)ReadPaid
Why connection matters for health, from a former US Surgeon General
Struggling right now? If you are in danger or thinking about harming yourself, contact local emergency services or a crisis line: Find a helpline (any country), Umang (Pakistan), Tele-MANAS, 14416 (India).