Stage 7 · Lesson 5 of 6
Turn it into a plan with dates
A post-mortem only matters if it changes what you do next. Turn the "do differently" section into two or three actions with dates. Make them specific using implementation intentions, a technique studied by Peter Gollwitzer: "When it is Sunday at 7 pm, I will send five applications" works better than "I will apply more".
Start smaller than you think you should; a plan you keep beats an ambitious plan you drop in a week. Tell someone your plan and when you will update them.
Common traprestarting with exactly the same approach and more willpower, or waiting until you feel confident before you begin again.
A question to check yourself and an AI practice session come when you add the roadmap to your account. Add it
Resources for this stage
Start with· follow one of these
- GuideFreeSelf-Compassion (Dr Kristin Neff)
Kristin Neff
Kristin Neff's free exercises for treating yourself like a friend after failure
- VideoFreeHow to Make Stress Your Friend (Kelly McGonigal, TEDGlobal 2013)
Kelly McGonigal (TEDGlobal 2013)
How seeing stress differently, and reaching out to others, changes how it affects you
Practise
Keep handy
Also worth your time
Struggling right now? If you are in danger or thinking about harming yourself, contact local emergency services or a crisis line: Find a helpline (any country), Umang (Pakistan), Tele-MANAS, 14416 (India).