Stage 1 · Lesson 6 of 7
Whose voice is in your head?
Family expectations do not stay outside you. After years of hearing them, they become part of how you think: you may feel guilty for wanting something different, or unsure whether you want medicine yourself or only want to make your parents happy.
Both can be true at once. Some of what your family wants, you may also want: stability, respect, being able to help them. Take time to sort it.
Write two lists: what I want for my life, and what I have been told I should want. Notice the overlap.
Common trapassuming that everything your family wants must be wrong for you. Rebellion can be as unthinking as obedience. You are looking for your own view, not the opposite of theirs.
A question to check yourself and an AI practice session come when you add the roadmap to your account. Add it
Resources for this stage
Start with· follow one of these
- BookPaidDifficult Conversations: How to Discuss What Matters Most
Douglas Stone, Bruce Patton, Sheila Heen (Penguin Books) · Paid book
The best book on separating what happened, feelings and identity in a hard family talk
- VideoFreeWhy We All Need to Practice Emotional First Aid (Guy Winch, TEDxLinnaeusUniversity)
Guy Winch (TEDxLinnaeusUniversity)
A short talk on looking after yourself when guilt and rejection hit hard
Keep handy
Also worth your time
Struggling right now? If you are in danger or thinking about harming yourself, contact local emergency services or a crisis line: Find a helpline (any country), Umang (Pakistan), Tele-MANAS, 14416 (India).